Hello! I found this website because I was looking for information on adult survivors of RAD.

We have two adopted siblings, and while both probably have attachment issues to some extent it is our daughter, age 10, who is having the most difficult time right currently. She and her brother have been with us for three years.

Our daughter does not have the severest manifestation of RAD, more like an extremely anxious or ambivalent attachment. She has about a four-month cycle. She goes between doing very well and being very loving, then the tension builds up and she goes through a period (can be several weeks at a time) of being extremely hostile and violent. It feels similar to the cycle of violence that is seen in domestic violence, which, of course, she was exposed to.

In her case the "chocolate and flowers" phase looks like making breakfast, mowing the lawn, mopping the floor, and cleaning her room all in one day. (It's familiar to me because I was in a relationship that h...